The world is always moving with bright lights and bustling sounds, why do many people like to be alone, make friends with loneliness? Do they have an insurmountable sadness in them?
Connecting with society and community is a legitimate human need. The older I get, the more I want to build relationships. Worldview, beliefs, empathy… are all products formed in our association with the community. Thus, in the social bias, spending time alone is often associated with feelings of sadness and loneliness that can destroy us. However, there are people who spend all day with other people and still feel lonely, while there are people who stay alone for months and still feel happy and enjoy life to the fullest.
Join us to discover the secret of happiness behind people who like to spend time alone and the outstanding characteristics that make them human!
Are people who like to be alone lonely souls?
People who prefer to live alone are often described as isolated and disconnected or anti-social. When it comes to them, many people immediately picture a lifestyle of self-isolation, “seclusion” all year round. Silence is also said to be the result of psychological events and problems.
In fact, being alone is an effective form of healing that offers many physical and mental health benefits if applied correctly. It is no coincidence that many writers and musicians choose to retreat to an absolutely quiet space during the creation of their works. So, loneliness is not always associated with sadness and negativity, some people feel comfortable with private time to get away from stress, daily hustle and bustle, some people actively be alone and love this state because then they can have space to face themselves, stimulate explosive ideas, think objectively, be calmer and more stable in the face of challenges. life. When being alone is a choice, it’s completely different from being alone.
Is being alone a bad thing?
The answer depends on why the person wants to be alone. The need for social connection is inherent in human perception. From ancient times, being isolated was a terrible punishment for many people. So, social exclusion can signal a worrying mental health condition like anxiety, depression, or low self-esteem. On the other hand, living alone can be a wonderful experience as you can accept yourself and learn how to find inner happiness.
Science has proven being alone is a necessary skill in this modern world. Your personal space allows you to be more productive, practice mental strength and endurance, know yourself better, plan your life more clearly… But in any case, the balance Equal is also an important factor. In order for being alone to not turn into loneliness, you should ask yourself if you are really comfortable with solitude, what you want to be alone for, and how long you need to be quiet.
5 types of lonely people
As social media communication becomes more common, more and more people feel lonely. A study conducted in 2021 found that 31% of Americans between the ages of 16 and 74 consider themselves loner. However, the state of “loneliness” actually has many different variations.
- Intentionally active loners: These are people who prefer to be alone because they feel better when they are alone and quiet. They actively seek solitude to improve their quality of life and mental health.
- Lonely people have negative intentions: They avoid people for negative reasons, such as feeling cynical about certain relationships, not being able to adapt to new environments, etc. These personality traits may be associated with antisocial personality disorder (APD).
- Unintentionally lonely people: They enjoy socializing but lack the skills necessary to maintain long-term positive relationships with others. They feel socially rejected and fill their minds with negative thoughts.
- Short-term lonely people: Sometimes, they want to be alone to purify their volatile souls. They will disconnect from the world for a certain period of time to rebalance their lives and soothe their spirits when they feel exhausted.
- Long-term loner: These individuals desire to be part of the vibrant world but have been isolated from society for a long time for various reasons. Whether active or passive, being alone for too long can lead to negative effects on mental health.
13 characteristics of a person who likes to be alone
1. They are introverts
Many people consider introverts to be the underdog in a hectic world. Contrary to this popular stereotype, their loneliness has immense power. Alone moments are the perfect time for them to connect with themselves, stay focused, and let their creative minds flourish. Although extroverts tend to be more popular in modern society, introverts do not feel left out when they are alone, but rather enjoy the peace and quiet. Private moments help them recharge their energy after dating, socializing, and finding balance in their idyllic lives.
2. They are independent people
Whether alone or with others, people who prefer privacy tend to get things done on their own and appreciate personal experiences.
High independence is also reflected in the fact that they completely trust their own thinking and decisions. They are willing to listen to your sharing with a sincere attitude but will not depend entirely on your suggestions. The sense of autonomy is also a factor that motivates them to work productively without too many binding regulations. Because of the independent nature of people who like to be alone, they tend to be more productive in environments where there are not many people around.
3. They do everything they like alone
The silence of people who like to be alone acts as a “shield” capable of protecting them from judgments and prejudices. They do what they like without worrying about what other people think. Reading a book all morning in a quiet room, walking in the park without anyone to accompany… – activities that easily make others feel claustrophobic and bored are the hobbies of people who like to spend their time for yourself. They also don’t mind having dinner or going to the movies with themselves and prefer to deal with problems “alone alone”. From the perspective of many people around them, they are often mistaken for suffering from boring isolation. However, private space is a place where they can freely enjoy simple happiness.
4. They value their time
People who like to be alone understand the value of time more than anyone, they realize that they can’t waste time and know how to use this “resource” wisely. They prefer to be at home or somewhere quiet to do constructive things with their lives, such as journaling to increase self-awareness, learning new skills, or just simply reading. take time to relax.
Besides appreciating their own time, they also care about other people’s time and won’t keep you waiting for any appointment.
5. They are self-reliant in everything
This is also a positive characteristic of people who like to be alone. They will choose to self-soothe rather than call a friend and confide in the issues that bother them. It’s hard to know when they’re grieving because they can control their emotions so well. Although they spend most of their time in a state of silence alone, they always have a positive mindset to find a way to solve their problems. As a result, they are not easily dependent on others.
6. They think deeply
The personality trait of people who like to be alone is that they like to observe things from a distance, listen attentively and think about things going on around them thoroughly before speaking or acting. Because they are used to being alone, their views are also less affected by outside factors.
The quietness of people who like to be alone is often “strategic”. As in a chess match, they are most likely thinking carefully about their next moves. The space of “solitude” allows them to connect with themselves, knowing what aspects of themselves need to develop to become the best version of themselves.
7. They are comfortable with familiar relationships
“Quality over quantity” is the best description of the circle of people who love being alone. They are not afraid to meet and get to know many people, but only pay attention to a few close relatives and friends. You will not often see them in the date, weekend afternoon tea. They feel comfortable, satisfied in their own space and only participate in meeting and fun activities when necessary, including important occasions such as someone’s birthday party, wedding or graduation. that’s in their circle. They are willing to attend parties to show their love and support to their loved ones. When the fun is over, they return to their own “safe zone”.
8. They love themselves
Often misunderstood for being “not active”, people who like to be alone are the ones who can understand their inner “child”, believe in themselves, and appreciate the small but meaningful things. that I can do. They have the ability to heal themselves emotionally, thereby being able to accept their mistakes and reconcile with their regrets.
They spend a lot of time focusing on themselves that doesn’t appear to be selfish or self-centered. Self-love is a sign of compassion, and narcissists are often open-minded and empathetic.
9. They avoid conflict
People who like to be alone are used to peace, so they tend to avoid unnecessary “marketing”. They don’t like to participate in discussions about other people and find it a waste of time . Therefore, they are very careful in making friends. If someone becomes disrespectful or looks down on their boundaries, they will firmly stay away from these relationships.
10. They have clear boundaries
They are aware that society at large is an integral part of human existence. They still like to be with friends, relatives, chat with colleagues or attend meetings with many people. However, they have personal boundaries that help protect themselves from people with toxic personality traits that can upset their tranquility.
11. Have high self-awareness
The state of “loneliness” creates space for them to organize their thoughts, feelings, and reflect on themselves. Practicing self-awareness helps them become more aware of their inner self and the world around them. As a result, they can make better choices, face the past honestly, confidently look to the future, and live a truly happy life.
12. They can keep calm well
The ability to stay calm in many situations is a hallmark of people who like to be alone. This capacity comes from the resilience they develop from being independent and self-reliant. They can manage and regulate their emotions in the face of failure or conflict. They remain stressed, overwhelmed, or anxious when something unfortunate happens suddenly, but instead of losing their cool, they immediately think of the best ways to overcome the difficulty.